Lifestyle Rekindling an Old Romance 10/30/2023 | By Amy Dickinson A man considers rekindling an old romance – with a friend’s wife, 40 years later, three years after the friend has died. Should he go for it? See what advice columnist Amy Dickinson has to say. Dear Amy: My friend “Brian” passed away over three years ago. I was friends with Brian and his wife “Marcia” for more than 40 years. Prior to their relationship and subsequent marriage, Marcia and I were very close friends. We never dated. We just liked each other’s company and had fun “hanging out” together. After a while, she wanted more from the relationship, but I was not ready for a long-term commitment, and shortly afterward, I moved to another state to open a restaurant. I was very happy when Brian and Marcia married; they had a great marriage, and raised two beautiful and successful children. My conundrum is this: I am now in my retirement years, divorced, with grown children. I have been thinking quite often about Marcia, but I don’t know how to approach her to see if she has any interest in rekindling the old feelings she had for me. Over the years I regretted not pursuing her. I was too young and too stupid. Now I see it like this: Life is too short to not try to make yourself happy. Is it wrong for me to even think about trying to date her? It feels wrong because she was married to my good friend. If the situation was different, I would want a close friend to be with my widow, knowing that he would be good to her. Any good advice would be much appreciated! – Go For It or Not? Dear Go For It: I have little advice for you, other than to encourage you to pursue rekindling an old romance, a relationship with someone you’ve known and liked for decades. You don’t note whether you have kept in close touch with “Marcia” over these last three years, but in my opinion, three years after a loss might present the right moment to make your move. Life is short – but love is long. I wish you all the best. In the tradition of the great personal advice columnists, Chicago Tribune’s Amy Dickinson is a plainspoken straight shooter who relates to readers of all ages. She answers personal questions by addressing issues from both her head and her heart. A solid reporter, Dickinson researches her topics to provide readers with informed opinions and answers – ranging from rekindling old loves, romance scams, and asking adult kids to reciprocate. Ask Amy, P.O. Box 194, Freeville, NY 13068. © 2023 by Amy Dickinson Click here to read more Ask Amy columns curated for a baby boomer audience. Read More Amy Dickinson